Are you ‘in love’?

I think I first saw this around 20 years ago on a US TV program. The wife wanted a divorce because she was no longer in love with her husband. I thought: these Americans are nuts. How is that a reason for divorce?

Now, however, this is so commonplace to the point where I notice people writing to advice columns saying they want to divorce for that reason, and online counsellors replying that it’s a good reason to divorce.

The world has gone mad! That feeling of being ‘in love’, that heady excitement is a temporary state of insanity. It doesn’t – and shouldn’t – last. Instead in a stable relationship it is replaced by being loving. Caring for your partner. But that state needs to worked on to achieve.

Before divorce was fashionable, people used to work on their marriage and go through the tough times to achieve this state. Now people just give up and move on to another partner, usually with similar characteristics to the one one they left.

And counsellors who are happy dispensing advice to leave a relationship when you’re not ‘in love’ are a part of the problem. The lunatics are running the asylum.

By Philip Braham on October 22, 2018.